For those of you who have wondered about Otis - here is the abridged version of the Tao Te Bin.
The Otis that can be described
Is not the eternal Otis.
Otis that can be named
This is not the eternal name.
The Otis is the eternally real.
Naming it is the origin
Of all particular drunks.
Free from sobriety, you realize the mystery.
Caught in sobriety, you only see the manifestations.
Yet drunkenness and manifestations
Arise from the same source.
This source is Otis.
Otis within Otis.
The gateway to all understanding.
When people see some things as fucked up,
Fucked up things become cool.
When people only see some things when drunk,
Other things look hung over and hazy.
Drunk and sober create each other.
Employed and unemployed support each other.
Excellent and bogus define each other.
Assholes and non-assholes depend on each other.
Cheap liquor and vomiting follow each other.
Therefore, Binner is drunk without taking a sip,
And teaches without saying a word.
Things arise and he lets them come;
Things disappear and he lets them go.
He has but does not possess,
Acts but does not expect,
Drinks, but does not hurl.
When the party is over, he forgets it.
That is why it lasts forever.
If you over esteem beautiful people,
Others become ugly.
If you Bogart your booze and smokes,
People begin to steal.
Binner leads by emptying peoples’ glasses
And filing their cores.
He helps everyone to party on,
And they abandon worry and ambition.
This creates confusion on those who think
They know Otis.
Practice getting lit
And everything will fall into place.
Otis is like an infinite keg –
Tapped, but never tapped out.
It is like the sky –
Empty, yet filled with infinite possibilities.
It can be sober
But always present.
I don’t know who gave birth to it,
It was probably Binner.
The Tao doesn’t take sides,
It gives birth to good and evil.
Binner doesn’t take sides,
He welcomes assholes and non-assholes.
The more you use Otis
The more it produces.
The more you speak of it
The less you understand.
Hold onto a blade of grass.
Otis is always present within you.
You can use it any way you want.
Otis is infinite and eternal.
Why is it eternal?
Because it is.
Why is it infinite?
It has no buzz for itself –
Thus, it brings enough for everyone.
So it is like Binner –
Present for all beings who party.
Binner is the master because he stays behind.
That is why he is ahead.
He drinks all drinks –
That is why he is one with them.
Because he has completely let himself go,
He is perfectly fulfilled.
When you are content to simply drink and be yourself,
And you don’t mouth or show off
Everyone will respect you.
Drink your drink,
Smoke your weed,
Then put on some tunes.
The only path to serenity.
Binner observes the world
And often falls off the side,
But he trusts his inner vision.
He allows things to come and go.
His heart is as open as a punch bowl.
Binner is profound and subtle.
His wisdom is unfathomable.
There is no way to describe him,
All we can describe is his appearance.
He is short.
He is drunk.
He is clear as vodka.
He is tranquil.
He is Binner.
This is Otis.
Do you have the patience to wait
Until the Old Crow nests in your mind?
The master doesn’t seek drunkenness.
By not seeking or expecting
He is present and can welcome all things.
All drunks in the universe
Return to the common source.
Returning to the source is Ovalon.
If you don’t realize the source,
You stumble in confusion, not drunkenness.
When you realize you are lit,
You naturally build up a tolerance,
Become amused, compassionate as a bartender –
Wise as a sage, dignified as a king.
Immersed in the wonder of Otis,
You become like Binner.
When Binner parties
The people are hardly aware he exists.
That is why Binner is the master.
Next best to the master
Is a drunk who is funny.
Next – one who is clever.
The worst is one who is an asshole.
This is not like Binner.
The master doesn’t talk
He builds a fire.
The guests of the party enjoy.
When the party is over, the host says,
“My party was amazing! I threw it all by myself!”
Stop thinking and planning!
What difference between yes and no?
What difference between drunk and just buzzed?
Throw away bullshit and build a fire.
This is keeping with the Bin Wei.
Must you value what the herd values?
Avoid what the herd avoids?
The herd is excited as if at the mall.
The master does not care.
He alone is expressionless,
Like a minor in the package store before they are legal.
The master keeps his mind always at one with the O.
This is why he is like the Tao.
This gives Binner radiance.
How can the master be at one with it?
Because he doesn’t cling to ideas.
Otis is dark and unfathomable –
How can it make him radiant?
Because he lights a fire with it.
Binner is born of Otis.
Otis is born of Binner.
Both are born of the Tao.
Tastes great – less filling,
Which is more important?
Bowl or papers –
Which is more valuable.
Drunk or sober –
Which is more destructive?
Be content with your own party, your own scene.
Rejoice in the way things are.
When you realize there is nothing lacking,
The whole world belongs to you.
True words aren’t eloquent;
Eloquent words aren’t true.
Good wines are not expensive,
Expensive wines are not always good.
Wise men do not need to prove their point;
Men who need to prove their point are wise asses.
The master knows the more he does for others,
The happier he is.
The more he drinks with others,
The drunker he gets.
The Tao nourishes by not forcing.
By not dominating, the master leads.