Friday, August 08, 2008

Breaking News – Clay Aiken Gives Birth to John Edward’s Love Child


Why is the news media so fixated on John Edwards and his alleged marital affair? Sure, it comes off as pretty lame that while his wife is battling cancer he’s off screwing some campaign aide that he met in a bar. But really, why should anyone give a shit about any of this very personal business?


CNN ran a “breaking news” story about the whole thing. Breaking news? Are you fucking kidding me? To quote Anderson Cooper, “There’s a war on. There’s a war on. There’s a war on!”


I’ve tried to ignore the articles that have been popping up throughout the blogosphere over the last couple of days. Then tonight I happened to tune into Larry King Live and there’s Wolf Blitzer drooling into his beard trying to get information out of Edward’s spokesperson about the affair.


Blitzer looked like a gossiping fishwife of the Gladys Kravitz variety. One could only speculate what was going on below the waist. My tolerance level peaked after about five minutes of this drivel and then I completely lost it.


And now even the Huffington Post has gone totally off the rails with the largest most absurd headline yet: “Anatomy of the Edwards Affair.”


I believe I’m long over due for a lengthy vacation from all things media. Somebody get me a beer and a shot gun.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

BIOFOOL CALLING FROM THE MOTHER SHIP (PACK MAIL). eXCELLENT AND ABSURD THE jOHN EDWARDS/ cLAY AIKEN BIT. tHE TAO TE BIN, NEXT WE'LL MAKE CONTRASTING COMPARISONS TO BINNER AND COSMOLOGY. HIS PLACE IN THE UNIVERSE.