An Open Letter to Richard Blumenthal

Photo Jessica Hill A/P

Dear Dick,

First, let me say that no one under 70 refers to them self as Dick. Throughout your illustrious career as the Attorney General of Connecticut you’ve always been called by your proper name, Richard. What gives? If you were trying to take yourself down several notches in hipness, then bravo, mission accomplished. But this letter isn’t about your recent choice of nickname, rather it is a plea for you to start your fucking campaign already!

Your opponent, the wrestling queen Linda McMahon, has done nothing but trash you in the media for over a year. She was trashing you before you even announced your bid for the Senate. True, there are many Republicans who have pledged to vote for you.  However, that really isn’t an excuse to phone it in campaign wise.

Every time I see a “Linda” lawn sign, or receive yet another of her asinine mailers or view one of the 50-a-freaking-day television commercials I get a little sick inside. It is a constant reminder of your lack of presence in this election. Where is Richard Blumenthal? I know you will kill her in the debate. That’s a given. But debates don’t win elections (see any Bush/Gore or Bush/Kerry debate for reference if you can stomach to watch). The voting population is pretty dim and apparently easily swayed by the constant gnat in their face that is the Linda McMahon money force. Get in there with a fly swatter!

You have a record that can prove you are the right person for this job. In case anyone was wondering, click here to see some pretty impressive accomplishments as Attorney General. Put that message out there. Take the biggest ones, like Broadwater, Consumer Protection, Education – and RUN WITH THEM!

Did you know that McMahon even bought the search engines? When you type in “Richard Blumenthal accomplishments” into Google or Ask.com do you know the first thing that comes up? Linda2010.com! Jesus H. Christ, can you get your people on this one at least? You’d be amazed at how lazy and gullible people are when it comes to the Internet. They click on the first reference that pops up.

Your race with McMahon should be a cake walk. Not only does she promote misogyny and steroid use  but she has no problem promoting necrophilia as  “fun” family entertainment! Furthermore, she has no clue what the minimum wage is, nor does she care!

She’s nothing more than an opportunist whose only goal is to influence federal tax laws in favor of the filthy rich in this country. Period. She’s the modern day equivalent of Lovie Howell. Don't make the same mistake Martha Coakley made in Massachusetts. Now they have a Republican centerfold as their Senator!

In case you need some ammo, view this gem from the WWE and then reflect on how utterly tacky and demeaning it will be to see Connecticut become the Florida of the north!

Brilliant!

Of course I’m going….

Not long after President Obama took office things in Washington began to devolve further and deeper into a wing nut hysteria that has managed to control the political narrative for almost two years. Enduring the likes of Sarah Palin, Glen Beck and the slew of disturbingly unqualified political candidates now enjoying and exploiting their status as “legitimate” in what can only be described as the Bizarro World is clearly effecting the masses. No amount of reason and logic seems to influence the mouth breathers in charge of the message. Lie after lie, tantrum after predictable tantrum, the so-called “right” in this country have managed to fuck things up so sublimely that they may actually see political gains in the house and senate come November.

Naturally, the media at its complacent best feels that its sole responsibility is to set up false equivalencies in order to perpetuate the illusion of balance. It’s a load of horseshit that the rest of the country is being force fed and it tastes nothing like pumpkin pie. Never in my life has there been so clear a picture of what is wrong and who is at fault. Yet the wing nuts continue to blabber about birth certificates, religion, abortion and Kenyan colonialism. Yes, they went there. The fact that none of these tea-party “patriots” can identify Kenya on a map is beside the point.

Watching it all happen in front of my eyes knowing that the only thing I can do is vote in a Connecticut election is of little solace. I gave the Coffee Party a try – enticed by all of their talk of unity and inclusion – but they turned out to be nothing more than a circular firing squad. The impotent rage I’ve felt these long months has had a detrimental effect on my quest for compassion and inner peace. What’s a rational human being to do in such a toxic climate? Is there no outlet?

Luckily, there will be one day when people like me (apparently 80% of Americans) can come together in celebration of reason and from what I hear, some pretty decent bars.   Yes, I speak of the Rally to Restore Sanity on the Mall in Washington DC on October 30th.  Leave it to the genius of the Stewart-Colbert planning committee who had the forethought to plan it for a Saturday (which I coincidentally have off from work) and the day before Halloween, so I’ll be home in time to see the nephews in all their glory. A win-win.

I’ll let the master explain:

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Rally to Restore Sanity
www.thedailyshow.com
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Mickey Rourke on a Dr. Pepper can.

Mission Accomplished?

You probably haven’t noticed yet, but Operation Iraqi Freedom, you know, “the war,” came to an end on Wednesday when the 4th Stryker Brigade, 2nd Infantry Division, was officially designated the last combat brigade to leave Iraq.  Granted, there will still be upwards of 50,000 of our men and women in uniform remaining for another year in a “non-combat” role, whatever that means,* but after seven plus years of unwarranted American ass-kicking in Babylon it’s kind of a slap in the face to our military who has sacrificed life and limb that this story hardly warranted a blip on the media radar screen. Sure, MSNBC covered it extensively. That’s about it. The Cooper Scooper gave it equal time with the “Ground Zero Mosque” non-story, and FauxNews gave it literally10 minutes of air time.

I figure it’s because all the bloviating, “America Fuck Yeah” testosterone-fueled war mongering that Republican jack offs and their wives/mistresses have been a-fearing us with since 9/11 has essentially ended because Obama kept yet another campaign promise to the American people. Are we suddenly safer? Does Iraq have a stable, democratically elected government and a security force in place to protect its citizens? No and no. Does it fucking matter to the interests of the United States? Hell no. It never did. We’ve wasted billions with a “b” and now we get to slink off in the night like a hotel guest who’s over stayed his welcome and must now make a hasty exit.

I find it laughable that the number one issue that brought the Democrats into power in 2006 – the Iraq war – has degenerated into such a “whatever” news story that most people don’t know about it or care to.  There are plenty of cynics (myself included) who believe this withdrawal may have been timed just perfectly for the mid-term elections coming up in November. However, if no one gives a shit about it, how can it have the desired influence on voters?

With all the lazy journalism taking place today it’s no wonder. How easy is it to spout an opinion about the merits of building a mosque at Ground Zero? An unwinnable argument void of even the basest of facts. Here’s a flash, 1 – it’s not a mosque, it’s a community center with an area for worship. There will be no calls to prayer or any of that; 2 – it’s TWO BLOCKS AWAY from the supposed hallowed ground where the towers formerly stood, the same distance as two famous titty bars, on OTB and several tacky street merchants selling useless crap created in Chinese labor camps commemorating the 9/11 tragedy; 3 – it’s the builder’s Constitutional Right to build this center.  Cue the resurgence of that ridiculous whisper campaign that Obama is Muslim. The White House had to actually issue a statement to placate these idiots whose ignorance is matched only by their hatred for the Commander in Chief. Because, you know, it’s news.

If only the collective intelligentsia in the news media (I realize this is a small club) would start a real conversation about what is happening in the country – deliberately excluding all the loud noises coming from the right - and actually inform the populace we might make some real progress in our quest to be the greatest nation on earth. As it stands, apparently we’re only number 11. 

*Aren’t all soldiers armed and combat ready regardless of their status? Christ, kitchen workers carry assault rifles!